Re: This letter to Ask Polly

[Caffeinated]

I find it interesting that on the one hand it can feel like it's harder to relate to people if you're in the group identified on standardized tests as smart or high IQ, but on the other hand one of the items frequently on the list for parents and teachers to identify if a child should be tested for the gifted program is that they are socially ahead of their peers.

[PintsizeBro]

I didn't have a lot of friends growing up, but I always had a few and I was satisfied with that. I never experienced being picked on by other kids for being one of "the smart ones," it was the adults I knew I needed to be wary of. It was the teachers who threatened me with punishment for reading in class when I was finished with my work. It was the principal who wrote me off as a troublemaker when I tried to get into more advanced classes.

I waited tables for five years to save money for college. My coworkers and even my customers regularly asked me what the hell I was doing there, because clearly I was meant for much better things. But what's a child of undocumented immigrants who was disowned and kicked out at 14 for being a lesbian to do? She was just as smart as me, but she had to drop out of high school and get whatever terrible job would hire a 14-year-old just to survive. And that's just one of the people I worked with. The conclusion I reached is that intelligence is only as useful as the opportunities you have to apply it.

At this point I'm getting a little far afield of the letter. But it does seem like Polly is answering the wrong question.